Notes for this theme
Reading comfort
GRM 48.5
«You must have seen that He is not like us… He must have something compelling!…»
«Oh! Yes.» John says. «His face! His eyes! What beautiful eyes, aren’t they, James?! And His voice!… Oh! What a voice! When He speaks, you seem to be dreaming of Heaven.
Peter talks about Jesus and says, referring to his physical appearance and the fact that he is the Messiah:
GRM 48.6
“Go. But don’t let the first words of contempt discourage you. He who wants to come with Me must be able to make headway against the sneering words of the world and the prohibitions of relatives. Because I am above blood and society, and I triumph over them. And he who is with Me will also triumph forever”.
GRM 48.7-8
48.7 «Speak, speak of Him, while we are going. Where is He?»
«In a poor house; they must be His friends»
«Is He poor?»
«A workman from Nazareth. So He said.»
«And how does He live now, if He does not work any longer?»
«We did not ask Him. Perhaps His relatives help Him.»
«It would have been better if we had brought some fish, some bread and fruit…, something. We are going to consult a rabbi, because He is like… He is more than a rabbi, and we are going empty-handed! Our rabbis don’t like that…»
«But He does. We had but twenty pennies between us, James and I, and we offered Him them, as is customary with rabbis. He did not want them. But since we insisted so much, He said: “May God reward you with the blessings of the poor. Come with Me” and He gave them to some poor people: He knew where they lived. And when we asked Him: “Master, are You not keeping anything for Yourself?” He replied: “The joy of doing the will of God and serving His glory”. We also said: “You are calling us, Master. But we are all poor. What shall we bring You?”, He replied with a smile which made us enjoy the delights of Paradise: “I want a great treasure from you”, and we said: “But we have nothing”. And He answered: “A treasure with seven names, which even the poorest may have, while the rich may not possess it. You have it, and I want it. Listen to the names: charity, faith, goodwill, right intention, continence, sincerity, spirit of sacrifice. That is what I want from My followers, only that, and You have it. It is dormant, like a seed under a winter clod, but the spring sunshine will make it sprout into a sevenfold spike”. That is what He said.»
«Ah! Now I feel that He is the true Rabboni, the promised Messiah! He is not harsh with the poor, He does not ask for money… It is enough to call Him the Holy Man of God. We can go safely.»
Peter asks John to tell him about the Messiah.
GRM 49
Maria sees John of Zebedee. He sees the Master and calls out to him. The two men talk. Jesus was praying and thinking about what he was going to say to the synagogue, but seeing spiritually that John was looking for him, he went to meet him. The son of Zebedee asks him if Jesus loves him, and Christ returns the question. John then reveals that he loves him very much, that his soul, according to him, had always been looking for him. When the Savior asks him what he will do if he has to leave his father, mother, brothers and sisters, as well as life, wife and love, John replies that Christ's love will take the place of father, mother, brothers, sister and wife. When Jesus speaks of his death, John doesn't want that to happen at all, and asks him for permission to love his Lord. Jesus grants it. James' brother is happy.
They then talk about Andrew and Peter, and Jesus heads for the synagogue. On the way, he comforts the child James, who is about to cry because he ran too fast. They talk briefly about the children of the Exodus and Limbo, and the boy is promised that he will go straight to Heaven when he dies, if he is good. This gives John the opportunity to ask the Master about his parentage. He confirms that he has no nephews, brothers or sisters, only cousins and his Mother. Finally, Jesus goes to preach in the synagogue.
He reads from the Book of Jeremiah, addressing the people of Israel who are weeping because of foreign occupation. Some say they still have the Temple, but the Lord reminds them that prayer is only holy if we have love for our neighbor. The rich who make great offerings, but are hard-hearted, are not accepted by God. So Christ urges them to be of good will, to be sincere and kind. He reminds us that the Law is simple, if we give the Commandments the light of love. After alluding to the Eucharist, he encourages souls to love.
Having finished his speech, he returns to Peter and Andrew. Jesus states Peter's character: he is a man who should refrain from judging without first informing himself, but he sincerely acknowledges his wrongs. The Master also asks Andrew why he didn't come earlier, and Peter confesses that it was he who held him back. The fisherman also confesses his weaknesses, and Jesus already gives him some initial advice. For the moment, God is not asking him to tear out his heart and separate himself from his most holy affections, but he is asking him to practice justice, love mercy, and apply himself totally to following his God. This pleases Peter. Andrew says nothing, but the Lord promises that he will become a lion. The Galileans leave him, but John wants to follow him to Jerusalem. Simon of Jonah encourages him to go and see Christ, and Jesus agrees to let John accompany him.
Jesus ends with a dictation on John's humility. He is the one who brings Peter to the Savior, but since the son of thunder knew Andrew's shyness, and John was just, Andrew fades into the background of his Gospel and lets people believe that Andrew is the Lord's first apostle.
How many, by comparison, proclaim themselves to be great apostles when their success comes from a combination of things, not only holiness, but also human audacity, luck, the fact that some people are less bold than we are, but perhaps holier than we are.
Christ encourages us not to glorify ourselves when we act well: we must always have a clear eye and "give to whom it may concern the praise that is due to him". We need to recognize the apostles through whom we can do our work effectively. We must be able to say: "I am the active instrument, but this one has more love than I do, prays better than I do, and it's thanks to him that I have the strength to act.
John is the favorite, he is the pure, the loving, the obedient, and he is very humble. Jesus mirrored himself in him, and his Mother felt as if she had a second son.
GRM 49.1-2
49.1 At 2 p.m. I see the following:
Jesus is coming along a little road, a path between two fields. He is alone. John is moving towards Him along a different path in the fields and he meets Him at last, going through an opening in a hedge.
John, both in yesterday’s vision and today’s, is very young. His face is rosy and beardless, the fair complexion of a youth who can hardly be called a man. There are no signs of moustache or beard, but only the smoothness of his rosy cheeks, his red lips, and his bright smile and pure look, not so much because of its deep turquoise hue, but because of the limpidity of his virginal soul shining through his eyes. His blond-brown long soft hair undulates at each step while he walks almost as fast as if he were running.
When he is about to pass through the hedge, he shouts: «Master!»
Jesus stops and turns around, smiling.
«Master, I have longed so much for You! The people in the house where You live told me that You had come towards the country. But they did not say where. I was afraid I might not meet you.» While speaking, John has bent his head slightly, out of respect. And yet, he is full of truthful love, both in his attitude and in his eyes, which he raises towards Jesus, while his head is still gently inclined towards his shoulder.
«I saw you were looking for Me and I came towards you.»
«You saw me? Where were You, Master?»
«Over there» and Jesus points to a group of trees far away, which, by the colour of their foliage, I would say were olive-trees.
«I was over there. I was praying, and thinking what to say this evening in the synagogue. But I came away as soon as I saw you.»
«But how could You see me, if I can hardly see the place, hidden as it is behind that hedge?»
«And yet, you see, here I am. I came to meet you because I saw you. What the eye does not do, love does.»
«Yes, love does.
49.2 You love me, therefore, Master?»
«And do you love Me, John, son of Zebedee?»
«So much, Master. I think I have always loved You. Before meeting You, long before my soul was looking for You, and when I saw You, my soul said to me: “Here is the One you are seeking”. I think I met You, because my soul perceived You.»
«You said it, John, and what you say is right. I also came towards you because My soul perceived you. For how long will you love Me?»
«Forever, Master. I no longer want to love anybody but You.»
«You have a father and a mother, brothers and sisters, you have your life, and with your life you have a woman and love. How will you be able to leave all that for My sake?»
«Master… I do not know… but I think, if it is not pride to say so, that Your fondness will take the place of father and mother, of brothers and sisters, and also of a woman. I will be compensated for everything, if You love me.»
«And if My love should cause you sorrows and persecutions?»
«They will be nothing, if You love me.»
«And the day I should die…»
«No! You are young, Master… Why die?»
«Because the Messiah has come to preach the Law in its truthfulness and to accomplish Redemption. And the world loathes the Law and does not want redemption. Therefore they persecute God’s messengers.»
«Oh! Let that never be! Do not mention that prediction of death to him who loves You!… But if You should die, I would still love You. Allow me to love You.» John’s look is an imploring one. He has bowed his head lower than ever, as he walks beside Jesus and seems to be begging for love.
Jesus stops. He looks at him, scrutinises him with His deep, penetrating eyes, and then lays His hand on his bowed head. «I want you to love Me.»
«Oh! Master!» John is happy. Although his eyes shine with tears, his well shaped young mouth smiles. He takes the divine hand, kisses it on its back, and presses it to his heart.
Physical description of Jean
GRM 49.2
«You have a father and a mother, brothers and sisters, you have your life, and with your life you have a woman and love. How will you be able to leave all that for My sake?»
«Master… I do not know… but I think, if it is not pride to say so, that Your fondness will take the place of father and mother, of brothers and sisters, and also of a woman. I will be compensated for everything, if You love me.»
«And if My love should cause you sorrows and persecutions?»
«They will be nothing, if You love me.»
Jesus questions John.
GRM 49.3
49.3 They take to the road again.
«You said you were looking for Me…»
«Yes, to tell You that my friends want to meet You… and because, oh! how I was longing to be with You again! I left You only a few hours ago… but I could no longer be without You.»
«Have you therefore been a good announcer of the Word?»
«Also James, Master, spoke of You in such a way as… to convince them.»
«So that he too who had no confidence — and is not to be blamed because his reserve was due to prudence — is now convinced. Let us go and give him full assurance.»
«He was somewhat afraid…»
«No! Not afraid of Me! I have come for good people and even more for those who stand in error. I want to save people, not to condemn them. I will be full of mercy with honest people.»
«And with sinners?»
«Also. By dishonest people I mean those who are spiritually dishonest and hypocritically they feign to be good, whereas they do ill deeds. And they do such things and in such a way for their own profit and to secure an advantage over their neighbours. I will be severe with them.»
«Oh! Simon, then, need not worry. He is as loyal as no one else.»
«That is what I like, and I want you all to be so.»
«Simon wants to tell You many things.»
«I will listen to him after speaking in the synagogue. I asked them to inform the poor and sick people in addition to the rich and healthy ones. They are all in need of the Gospel.»
GRM 49.4
49.4 They are near the village. Some children are playing in the road and one of them runs into Jesus’ legs and would have fallen if He were not quick in getting hold of him. The child cries just the same, as if he had been hurt and Jesus, holding him in His arms, says: «An Israelite who is crying? What should the thousands of children have done, who became men crossing the desert with Moses? And yet, the Most High Lord sent the sweet manna for them, rather than for the others, because He loves innocent children and looks after these little angels of the earth, these wingless little birds, just as He sees to the sparrows of woods and towns. Do you like honey? Yes? Well, if you are good, you will eat honey which is sweeter than the honey of your bees.»
«Where? When?»
«When, after a life of loyalty to God, you go to Him»
«I know that I cannot go there unless the Messiah comes. My mother says that now, we in Israel, are like many Moses and we die seeing the Promised Land. She says that we are there, waiting to go in, and that only the Messiah will make us go in.»
«What a clever little Israelite! Well, I tell you that when you die, you will go to Paradise at once, because the Messiah will already have opened the gates of Heaven. But you must be good.»
«Mummy! Mummy!» The child slides down from Jesus’ arms and runs towards a young woman, who is entering her house holding a copper amphora. «Mummy! The new Rabbi told me that I will go to Paradise at once when I die and. I will eat so much honey…. If I am good. I will be good!»
«God grant it! I am sorry, Master, if he troubled You. He is so lively!»
«Innocence does not trouble, woman. May God bless you, because you are a mother who is bringing her children up in the knowledge of the Law.»
The woman blushes at being praised and replies: «May the blessing of the Lord be with You, too.» And she disappears with her little one.
GRM 49.4
Innocence does not trouble.
Jesus said:
GRM 49.5
49.5 «Do You like children, Master»
«Yes, I do, because they are pure… sincere… and affectionate.»