«Judas, I want to be alone at night time. At night, My spirit gets its nourishment from the Father. Prayer, meditation and solitude are more important for Me than material food. He who wishes to live for the spirit, and lead others to live the same life, must disregard the flesh, even more, I would say: kill it, to devote all his attention to the spirit. Everybody must do that, you know, Judas. You, too, if you really want to belong to God, that is to the supernatural.»
«But we are still on the earth, Master. How can we neglect the flesh and take care only of the spirit? Is what You say not the antithesis of God’s commandment: “You shall not kill”? Does the commandment not forbid also suicide? If life is a gift from God, must we love it, or not?»
«I will not reply to you as I would reply to a simple-minded man, whom it is sufficient to get to raise his soul or his mind to supernatural spheres, so that we can take him with us flying in spiritual kingdoms. You are not a simple-minded person. You were formed in an environment that refined you… and it also marred you with its quibbles and doctrines. (...) 69.2 But let Me reply to your question, so that you may not say that you were left in error through a fault of Mine. It is true that to kill oneself is the same as killing other people. Both our own and other people’s lives are the gift of God and only God, Who gives life, has the authority to take it. Who kills himself, confesses his own pride, and pride is hated by God.»
«He confesses his pride? I would say his despair.»
«And what is despair but pride? Just think, Judas. Why does one despair? Either because misfortunes persistently perturb him and he wants to overcome them by himself, but is unable to do so. Or because he is guilty and he thinks that he cannot be forgiven by God. In both cases, is not pride the basic reason? The man who wants to do all by himself, is no longer humble enough to stretch out his hand to the Father and say to Him: “I am not able, but You are. Help me, because I hope and wait for everything from You”. The other man who says: “God cannot forgive me” says so, because measuring God by his own standards, he knows that another person could not forgive him, if that person had been offended, as he offended God. So here again it is pride. A humble man understands and forgives, even if he suffers for the offence received. A proud man does not forgive. He is proud also because he is not capable of lowering his head and saying: “Father, I have sinned, forgive Your poor guilty son”. But do you not know, Judas, that the Father will forgive everything, if one asks to be forgiven with a sincere, contrite, humble, heart willing to rise again to new life?»
«But certain crimes are not to be forgiven. They cannot be forgiven.»
«That is what you say. And it will be true only because man wants it to be true. But, oh! I solemnly tell you that even after the crime of crimes, if the guilty man should rush to the Father’s feet – He is called Father, Judas, just for that, and He is a Father of infinite perfection – and crying, implored Him to be forgiven, offering to expiate, without despairing, the Father would make it possible for him to expiate and thus deserve forgiveness and save his soul.»
69.3 «Well, then, You say that the men quoted by the Scriptures who killed themselves, did wrong.»
«It is not lawful to do violence to anybody, not even to oneself. They did wrong. In their limited knowledge of good, perhaps in certain cases, they had mercy from God. But after the Word has clarified the truth and has given strength to spirits with His Spirit, then he who dies in despair will no longer be forgiven. Neither in the instant of the personal judgement, nor after centuries of Gehenna, on Doomsday, never! Is that hardness by God? No: it is justice. God will say: “You, a creature gifted with reason and supernatural knowledge, created free by Me, you decided to follow the path you chose and you said: ‘God will not forgive me. I am separated from Him forever. I think I must apply the law by myself to my own crime. I am parting from life to evade remorse without considering that you would no longer have felt remorse if you had come to My faithful bosom. And let it be done to you, as you judged. I will not violate the freedom I gave you”.
That is what the Eternal Father will say to suicide. Meditate on it, Judas. Life is a gift, a gift to be loved. But what gift is it? A holy gift. So love it holily. Life lasts as long as the flesh holds out. Then the great Life, the eternal Life begins. A Life of blissful happiness for the just, of malediction for the unjust. Is life a purpose or a means? It is a means. It serves for a purpose which is eternity. Then let us give life what is required to make it last and serve the spirit in its conquest. Continence of the flesh in all its lusts, in all of them. Continence of the mind in all its desires, in all of them. Continence of the heart in all human passions. Infinite instead is to be the ardour for heavenly passions: love of God and the neighbour, obedience to the divine word, heroism in good and virtue.
69.4 I have given you the answer, Judas. Are you convinced? Is the explanation sufficient? Be always sincere, and ask when you do not yet know enough: I am here to be your Master.»
«I have understood and it is sufficient. But… it is very difficult to do what I have understood. You can… because You are holy. But… I am a man, young and full of life…»
«I have come for men, Judas. Not for the angels.»