GRM 7.5
The Gospel as revealed to me
Quotation
« I would also like to be a sinner, a big sinner, if I were not afraid of offending the Lord… Tell Me, mummy, can one be a sinner out of love of God?»
«But what are You saying, my dear? I don’t understand You.»
«I mean: to commit a sin in order to be loved by God, Who becomes the Saviour. He who is lost, is saved. Isn’t that so? I would like to be saved by the Saviour to receive His loving look. That is why I would like to sin, but not to commit a sin that would disgust Him. How can He save Me if I do not get lost?»
Anne is dumbfounded. She does not know what to say.
Joachim helps her. He has approached them walking noiselessly on the grass, behind the low hedge of vine-shoots. «He has saved You beforehand, because He knows that You love Him and You want to love Him only. So You are already redeemed and You can be a virgin as You wish» says Joachim.
«Is that true, daddy?» Mary embraces his knees and looks at him with Her clear blue eyes, so like Her father’s and so happy because of this hope She gets from Her father.
«It is true, my little darling. Look! I was just bringing You this little sparrow, that at its first flight landed near the spring. I could have left it there but its weak wings did not have enough strength to fly off again, and its tiny legs could not hold onto the slippery moss stones. It would have fallen into the water. But I did not wait for that. I took it and now I am giving it to You. You will do what you like with it. The fact is that it was saved before it fell into danger. God has done the same with You. Now, tell me, Mary: have I loved the sparrow more by saving it beforehand, or would I have loved it more saving it afterwards?»
«You have loved it now, because you did not let it get hurt in the cold water.»
«And God has loved You more, because He has loved You before You sinned.»
«And I will love Him wholeheartedly. Wholeheartedly. My beautiful little sparrow, I am like you. The Lord has loved us both equally, by saving us… I will now rear you and then I will let you go. And you in the forest and I in the Temple will sing the praises of God, and we shall say: “Please send the One You promised to those who expect Him”. »
Detail
Mary as a child has decided to be a virgin out of love for God, and she hopes to be the handmaid of the Mother of God. Then she adds:
Annotation
Can one be a sinner out of love for God? (...) How can he save me if I do not lose myself?
This paradoxical relationship between sin and grateful love for the Redeemer can be found in the Easter Exultet: Blessed is the sin of man, which brought the only Saviour to the world in distress!
Saint Paul also cultivates this paradox out of love for his brethren: I myself, for the Jews, my brethren by race, would wish to be anathema, separated from Christ (Romans 9:3).